Angel Soft: Can you toss me a roll

As you'll soon see, I really over think the ads. Why? Because it's what I do with everything really. You could try to come up with some psycho-analytical reason as to why, but I once read that lefties make everything more difficult than they need to, so I'm going with that.

This little trait of mine leads me to our first commercial: Angel Soft Toss Me A Roll.

Have you seen it? I'm sure you have, it's been on constantly. Apparently Americans poop a lot. Could have something to do with our meat-heavy, fatty food-laden diets. But hey, we're number 1! Winning! Duh! (Obligatory Charlie Sheen reference: Check)

Anyway, here's the ad in case you get Internet under the rock beneath which you're living if you have yet to see this ad.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYZMlOFU4zM

First thought: Okay, we've all done it. Walked in and realized only too late that oops, the roll is empty. HELP! That's fine.

But after he was either tossed a roll of toilet paper (or bath tissue as they call it, which somehow is apparently supposed to soften the thought that we wipe our butts with this stuff) or was grazed by a high-powered elephant round, you'd think he would be a bit more careful about asking someone to lob an apparently lethal weapon at him. But no! We see he hasn't learned from this incident, and again asks for someone to toss him the TP, mangy looking head wound notwithstanding. This time the off-camera throwmeister apparently chucked a snowball at the guy. Nice.

In a living example of Einstein's definition of insanity, the guy once again asks someone to "toss him a roll." This time, we see the scamp has been his wife. However, she took pity after nearly killing him and then pelting him with fluff, and tosses Angel Soft. Aaahhh.

Here's my question: After the second time, don't you think he would have, oh, I don't know, gotten the roll himself rather than risk his life? Maybe his wife really is trying to kill him, or at least get him to leave. After all, every time we see this guy, his wife is apparently doing laundry, since that's where she is, throwing him another roll. Perhaps if he pitched in around the house, she'd be a bit nicer.

All this said, it's still not the worst toilet paper commercial out there. If I never see those charmin bears with the pieces of toiler paper on their bear buts, or as I call them, The Dinglebearies, I'll be a happy man.

I really don't like these bears...