The Perfect Situp

I was writing my last entry when I just saw this ad for the first time:

The Perfect Situp.

Really?

REALLY!?

Do people really pay for this stuff? Why do you need a goofy machine to lift your feet while you do a sit up? Why can't you just do that on your own?

Oh, there's an audible sound that tells you when you're doing the exercise correctly. Funny, I just thought that audible sound was my spine popping. Or maybe the distant laughter of these people who sold this device to "another idiot." Either way, I'm quite capable of making sounds when doing a crunch without the help of an expensive product.

Do you know how hard it is to not make a "fart" joke here? Keeping it classy.

They say a fool is born every minute, and a fool and his money are soon parted. So it's no surprise that industries have popped up taking advantage of those two statements. Why are we rushing out to buy this machine? Well, we as in someone else. Certainly not me. Oh, it was invented by a Navy seal. Hey, that must mean it's worth it. The guy who is fit and can kill you fifty ways with a spork made this. That either means A)He knows his stuff when it comes to sit ups or B)It's a thinly veiled threat that unless my fat ass buys this thing now, a team of highly trained military assassins will bust in and water board me until I buy one.

This brings up another point...why are we so impressed by products invented by people who wouldn't normally invent things? Do we have an innate distrust of scientists, or are we just supposed to be ecstatic that a teacher invented Airborne? Don't get me wrong, I have the utmost respect for teachers, but I'm not necessarily ready to buy a medical product because it was invented by some lady who was sick of dealing with snot-nosed kids (literally in this case) and made up a tablet versus some guys who went to college for this kind of stuff doing so in a lab.

But seriously, why would I buy this? Why can't I just lift my legs when doing some crunches and get those hard to reach lower abs by myself? Oh...

A university study says it's 180 percent better. Granted, they don't say what university, but hey, universities never lie about anything. Nor do commercials. I definitely need one of these.

Hell, I need one for every room, so no matter where I'm not working out, I can see it sitting in the corner collecting dust, and I can add fiscal irresponsibility guilt to my regular not-working-out guilt.